Hug a farmer

Hugs. Squeezes. Embraces. Cuddles.

They are such a simple way to show emotion.

Affection. Appreciation. Love. Excitement. Comfort. Joy.

Hugs can be used in the place of words, in those moments when you find that your arms move easier than your mouth.

I’m sorry. I love you. It will get better. I missed you. I am so glad you are alive.

Much like the benefits of homemade chicken noodle soup, science has proven what every grandmother has known since the dawn of time. Hugs are good for your health. The act of hugging lowers your blood pressure, heart rate and decreases the amount of stress hormones released. Hugs also increase the levels of oxytocin, “the hug hormone,” which lowers your stress level as well. Scientists have found that hugging gets your thymus gland working, helping to give your immune system a boost. In case you need the important people to tell you, hugs help you sleep better as well. So, make sure to squeeze a couple in before bedtime.

I like to imagine a room full of white-coat-clad scientists with glasses perched precariously on the edges of their noses hugging one another for the recommended 20 seconds, then turning around and measuring all these respective levels within themselves. Since any Google search about hugs pops up a long list of life benefits, it is no wonder that people within the agricultural industry have managed to pair this with some of our very huggable animals. There are working farms that offer reservations to cuddle a cow (which is typically a calf) for 30-minute blocks. There are places that offer cuddling goat kids to help with your stress relief, and of course, there is always goat yoga if that is not your cup of tea.

This past week was filled with an abundance of hugging for a multitude of reasons. My friend, Julie, and I loaded up two vans of very, very excited girls and headed off to World Dairy Expo. Between the girls hugging each other with anticipation and the hugs from friends I hadn’t seen in a year, the day was hug-filled. We even witnessed a young lady giving her beautiful Brown Swiss a celebratory hug as the judge placed them near the top. Marion was spending her last full day in the U.S. with us at Expo, and the weather, sights and sounds of Expo did not disappoint. Our posse of eight girls, Julie, and I walked Marion up to her hotel room where the hug and cry line began in earnest. They say yawning is contagious, but I think crying might be as well. All it took was one look at the crocodile tears on Brynn’s cheeks and two more girls, Marion and I, were done for. We all had to squeeze Marion at least twice. France is more than a hop, skip and jump away from Wisconsin after all. We discussed how grateful we all were that we got to have Marion spend a summer with us, and how amazing it is that we now know someone in France.

The route home from Expo managed to steer my dear friend Sadie and her three awesome kids to Hotel Ocooch (our farmhouse) for a Friday night stay. If you have ever met Sadie, you know that she gives incredible hugs. Her hugs are like having a boa constrictor squeeze you — in the best of ways. They are strong, loving hugs that are an entire conversation, without actual words. They also always last more than the 20-second health guideline minimum, making them amazing on so many levels. We caught up a bit, and I got to learn just how cool her kids are growing up to be. Saturday morning brought everyone finding a pair of overalls to throw on and wandering up to the barn to help finish chores so we could enjoy a late breakfast together. After a tour of our farm and my gardens, hugs were shared all around and they headed back to the Land of 10,000 Lakes.

Saturday evening was a Mlsna wedding reception. My cousin, Barb, and Jake said “I do” at last. It met all the requirements for a great party — dancing music that never stopped, fabulous meal and fun humans. As I was replaying the night’s events over in my head, I realized that I didn’t have many long conversations with people, but I gave and received many, many hugs. In truth, that is where the idea for this column came from. I was in a great mood on Sunday. Was it the energy high from dancing for four hours straight? Was it the hugs from so many wonderful family members I haven’t seen since deer season last year? Perhaps both, but the hugs were so great. The sweet, tiny squeezes from the littlest of my second cousins, already counting down the days until our annual Thanksgiving weekend of fun. The bear hugs from the teens anxious to show how they are growing up as I coerced them into learning how to two-step around the floor. The loving embraces of my first cousins, their hugs full of love and sincere caring about me and my health. The sweet hugs from my aunts, and scruffy face snuggles from my uncles that seem to be aging more than I am ready for them to. It was a night full of love, and it made many new memories.

Family therapist Virginia Satir said, “We need four hugs a day for survival. We need eight hugs a day for maintenance. We need 12 hugs a day for growth.”

I like the thought that a hug can help you grow.

Sometimes in our busy days of farming with our families, we forget that hugs are important. We may be more inclined to want to wrap our arms around a cow than a family member. In the age of talking about the mental health of farmers, and also the age of cuddling cows, perhaps we as farmers should put more effort into hugging the humans that would benefit from the connection, instead of the cattle. Unless there are scientists out there that are researching the effects of human to cow hugs on milk production. If that is the case, hug away.

Jacqui Davison and her family milk 800 cows and farm 1,200 acres in northeastern Vernon County, Wisconsin. Her children, Ira, Dane, Henry and Cora, help on the farm while her husband, Keith, works on a grain farm. If she’s not in the barn, she’s probably in the kitchen, trailing after little ones or sharing her passion of reading with someone. Her life is best described as organized chaos, and if it wasn’t, she’d be bored.